“But why,” he said in the gasping voice of one subduing an agony, and looked at her from under a pain-wrinkled brow, “why did you not tell me this before?” “I didn’t know—I thought I might be able to control myself. "No," replied Jonathan, moodily. This was a much more serious task than he anticipated. And I’ll have that story off you as we journey back to town. A neighbor stopped by as the day wore on, causing her to duck and cower as he rang the doorbell over and over. She felt herself falling, her bile rising in her 61 throat, the cold wind spinning around her like vertigo. The immense disillusionment that awaited him! The devastating disillusionment! She had a vague desire to run after him, to state her case to him, to wring some understanding from him of what life was to her. Then he would come along the laboratory, sitting down by each student in turn, checking the work and discussing its difficulties, and answering questions arising out of Russell’s lecture.
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